Well, this is it. The last remnants of my old blog from MySpace. It was fun looking at these old posts, seeing where life was in 2008, or so. It also reminds me yet again what blogging is kind of all about. It’s a forum to write about my stuff and like I said a post or two ago, I don’t have deadlines, assignments or any responsibilities. It’s about fun and life. When those things intersects, great. If they don’t oh well. I’ll do my best. Hope you enjoy these little blurbs.
Current mood: crappy
The good news: physically, got some great news from my surgeon! No hernias on either side. Some strange muscle thingy on one side, a fatty tumor on the other. Other than word choice there is no cutting in the foreseeable future.
The bad news: children, especially the boy. For the past week, everything is a meltdown. “Please change your pants.” SCREAMING. “Go play in your room.” SCREAMING. This morning was the end. A fifteen minute meltdown finally pushed me over the edge. I feel like crap because I got so angry, it just doesn’t feel good. I feel hungover. Father of the year is not coming my way…
May 20, 2008
Current mood: nostalgic
I’m guessing that most of the folks that read this blog know me and if you don’t well, hello. This must be the most boring blog you check out. As most of you know, I’m a member of Alcoholics Anonymous and have been for seventeen years.(eek! now 20+) In that time I’ve attended literally thousands of meetings, most of them indistinguishable from another. Every once in a while, something special happens. A meeting takes on a personality, it becomes its own thing, a special moment in time. This can last for months or years, but ultimately it comes to an end. Some my greatest memories and friends come from these moments. The Sense of Humor group in East Lansing, Sundays at Church of Our Savior and the Mayflower group just to name a few. Now a meeting that was a great part of my sobriety the last couple of years is calling it quits. The Prince William Group was a group that meant a lot to me. After a while it lost some of its punch and then some internal things disrupted the membership. For the last few months four guys had kept it going, but now they just can’t do it anymore. Moving on is always hard, but it definitely is time. PWG served its members very well and made many of us better people. I’m glad I’ll always have a connection to PW alums and I’m positive another group will emerge for all of us somewhere and some of us will even be together.
May 12, 2008
Current mood: sick
Yeah, so the kids have been sick basically for the last two weeks, and finally while far away in the southwest suburbs, I got sick. Whoopee! Two exits, no waiting. Productivity was already down, now its nil. I really want to make this summer count, but it’s not off to a good start. Oh, well many months to go, but I hate feeling like I’m not making and progress. I need to get this thing finished. I need to move on and maybe that’s why these last two chapters are proving to be such a bear. I’m ready to move on, but the work isn’t done. Back to work
Apr 28, 2008
Current mood: chipper
So, I wrote this essay about becoming a White Sox fan and sent it off to a website. And what do you know? They decided to put it on the site this week. What is hilarious is that reading it online it seems far too long. I need to work on my journalistic prose it seems. Anyway, if you are at all interested (and I find it hard to believe that this page has been viewed a thousand times) feel free to check out my much needed non-academic ramblings at:
(Sorry, the link is dead! 11/2/2011)
Apr 16, 2008
Current mood: exhausted
First, sorry to everybody who got bulletins from “me.” While I hope everyone who reads this does find “tru” love, I don’t think the match maker website is your best option. Go with an escort service first. If that doesn’t work anonymous sex seems to work really well. So, I’ve been working like a dog the last few days, but it has little to do with the old dissertation. Tending to two sick tots is much more tiring than just about anything I’ve encountered. Nothing beats being greeted by a four year old covered in shit, saying “I had a little accident.” He still has a little trouble with perspective. No buddy, crapping the bed is not little, especially three times in two days. The girl had issues too, but mostly just cranky. What makes matters worse is that they don’t understand that certain foods are not a good idea on an upset stomach. So two children screaming for hot dogs was pretty much how my day went yesterday. Today, I finally am back to the grind, but I REALLY just want to lay on the couch and embrace the silence.
Apr 3, 2008
Current mood: blah
So, I’m working. Back to it as they say. Reading about World War II, and it’s kind of boring, really. I’m itching to get back to writing but I need to read some of this stuff just to see where I fit. I really wish I was finished with this chapter so I can do the last chapter. It is a much more exciting bit. But to quote the “program” first things first. And thank goodness the White Sox actually won!
- Mar 24, 2008
Current mood: crazy
The best way to explain how I’m feeling is difficulty with re-entry. I was in NYC for research last week and it was INTENSE. I put in four straight days at the archive, basically from open to close. By the last day my brain was mush and I could still be there tracking down more stuff. Anyway, back home, Easter celebration and today, first day “back to normal.” I’m quite simply out of sorts. I have this mountain of information, and yet no where to go right now. So, what else should I do except write a bit on the old blog? The new chapter beckons and I’m itching to do SOMETHING! I just don’t know what…
Dec 11, 2007
Current mood: anxious
eek! I can’t believe I haven’t posted a blog in so long. Been a bit busy, lots of work, both by me and the spouse, have an operation coming up, whoo-hoo. But as another chapter wraps up, I felt a compulsion to write even more. What can I say, finishing a chapter is very cool, and if I’m not too fucked up from the surgery (hernia, oh make that a double) I should be well into the next one by the new year. To be honest, having hernia surgery makes me feel very old. I just don’t think my body should be breaking down just yet and that is what it feels like. This week is all about finishing the chapter before Friday’s date with the doctor’s table. The pressure to finish, the pressure/guilt I feel about being laid up for a week, plus not being able to pick up the kids for a month really sucks and is wearing me down. Oh, yeah, the holidays are coming, no stress there. Well, by this time next week I’ll have a story to tell. I wonder how Vicodin will effect it?
Aug 8, 2007
Current mood: anxious
So, back from NYC and a good mix of work and play. Got to two different archives and both produced fruit. The most stressful/exciting things to happen was that one of the big names in my field has shown interest in my dissertation topic. Three people have told me to get into touch with him, and now he would like to talk. The exciting aspect is that I’m on the right track, the stressful aspect is that I’m freaking out. The anxiety is that we’ll have a talk and he will say, “wow, you suck. please stop writing now.” I know logically that probably won’t happen, but it is still there.
It was great to be in NYC with my son, bopping around Central Park, checking out the Museum of Natural History, and introducing him to real pizza. On top of that, went to Yankee Stadium with my dad. A multigenerational experience in the city. As far as Yankee Stadium goes: it is pretty much a dump. An old dump, but still a dump. It is no wonder that they will be getting a new stadium. Now if only the rubes in Chicago would get a clue…
Jul 30, 2007
Wow! kind of a let down. A chapter is in to the advisor, for better or worse. I’m gearing up for the usual commentary, with perhaps a little more thrown in about how, yes, I did go overboard on a certain section. While I know its far from over, it is great to be moving on from this point on to the next chapter. Usually I take a longer break between all of this, but I’ve a research trip set up for this week, so no rest for the wicked. My goal, beside the next chapter being done 9/30, is to do my research this week, get home and write whatever is there, 10 pages, 2 pages, doesn’t matter, just need to limit the time between research and writing. It’s funny every time I take a step closer to the finish line, I get an overwhelming sense of nostalgia, thinking about moving from Chicago, what life will be like when I’m finished. It is a strange place to be in, if only for a day or two. Moving is going to be extremely tough, if it happens at all, who knows?
Jul 23, 2007
let’s face it, vacation is detrimental to productivity. God, I can even think about work, which isn’t good, seeing how I REALLY need to get some business done. Vacation was pretty good, all things considered. I need to go on vacation without any extended family however, just the immediate unit for a week or so. We were in St. Joe’s MI which is an excellent get away from Chicago or other points in the midwest. Very nice beaches, cute town and not far away to make the trip unbearable. We went to the beach everyday, ate very poorly, and there was a carnival in town for the evening hours. If this dissertation thing doesn’t work out, I think I’d make an excellent carny, just take out all of my dental work and I’d fit right in…
Jul 11, 2007
I think the last time I posted, there was a finished chapter. There still is, and it still needs to go to the boss. Vacation is staring me down and no work will be done. I’m not too sure I like that. The stress of this whole process is really getting to the family and it needs to be done. One more chapter by the end of September and I’ll feel on track. so, there it is a commitment to the ether, September 30th, next draft.
Jun 26, 2007
Current mood: chipper
A slight departure from the normal fodder, but on Sunday for the first time in my life, I scored a goal in a soccer game! No, I don’t believe it either, which is probably why I proceeded to retrieve the ball from the net as if to make sure it really happened. Like I said, I’m a dork. Unfortunately, the game was a draw which we should have won. It is amazing what diet and exercise will do over the course of six months to a year. Last year when I played soccer, I could barely make it a half. Sunday, due in large part that we were short on players, I played the entire game and was barely winded.
Back to the writing, which I am avoiding because to finish what I’m working on means to be finished with a chapter, which means shipping it off to the boss, which means feedback, which is usually quite a letdown. “Needs work”, “flabby”, and “interesting” are pretty much standard fare. I know it’s a draft, but a little something to go on would be a huge help. I’m not asking for high praise, but monosyllable communication doesn’t quite lift the spirits. Not like scoring a goal anyway…